Brilliant, Not Broken: You’re Not Lazy, You’re Navigating

May 22

“You’re just lazy.”
How many of us have had those words thrown at us by a parent, a teacher, a partner, or even our own inner critic? It’s one of the deepest cuts. Not because we believe it’s true, but because some small part of us fears it might be.

But let me say this as clearly and lovingly as I can:
You are not lazy. You are navigating.

In Episode 2 of Brilliant, Not Broken, I name something that many of us carry but rarely say out loud: the shame that comes with struggling to “keep up.” The guilt that bubbles up when you can’t push through, follow through, or even start at all. However, what looks like laziness from the outside is often executive dysfunction on the inside. It’s the hidden cost of living with ADHD, anxiety, depression, trauma, or burnout. It’s not that we don’t WANT to do the thing. It’s that our brain, our body, our nervous system won’t let us.

The Myth of Motivation

We live in a society that treats motivation like a character trait, something you either have or you don’t. But for those of us who are neurodivergent or dealing with chronic mental health challenges, motivation isn’t a switch we flip. It’s a complex dance between energy, capacity, regulation, and overwhelm.

Sometimes, just getting out of bed feels like a win. Sometimes, doing one small thing is all we’ve got in us. And sometimes… we do nothing at all, and that’s okay too. You are not lazy for needing rest. You are not lazy for feeling frozen. You are not lazy for being overwhelmed.

What people don’t see are the mental gymnastics behind the scenes:

The 30-minute internal pep talk before writing one email
The way your body shuts down when you’re overstimulated
The shame that creeps in when you cancel plans AGAIN, because you just don’t have it in you
The exhaustion that hits, not from doing nothing, but from doing everything in your mind

This invisible labor is real, and it is valid. So if your brain is tired, your heart is heavy, and you feel like you're running through mental molasses, let me offer this:

You’re brilliant, not broken. You’re doing the best you can with what you’ve got, and that is enough.

Give yourself credit for every single small win.
Give yourself grace when the day doesn’t go as planned.
And give yourself space to just be, with no shame attached.

Reflection